Conflicts are a normal part of life, especially corporate. For a range of reasons – from different agenda through varying priorities and perspectives – people disagree. Competitive and passionate people seem to have more conflicts than others. It is as if the very things that make them successful also get them into trouble.
As I look at the conflicts of yesterday and today, I find myself trying to see the conversation through the eyes of everyone involved. In the process I find that individuals seem to hold one of two distinct agendas. One is based on self and greed. The other comes from conviction and belief.
While I do not know what will work for you in your conflicts, I do find that there are three mantras that are helping me in mine.
Having a view on another’s agenda will shape the way one discovers the options and alternatives. One should never assume that they know. It is important to have an open mind, seeking to understand the intent and purpose behind the actions.
If you are facing conflicting view that is driven by self and greed, get help! Winning a one on one battle with someone that believes the end justifies the means is difficult. The process begins to simplify when others enter on your side.
Take a regular look at your agenda. It is easy to assume that one is focused on the right values and priorities. While we know that “anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know very well that eternal life and murder don’t go together.” (1 John 3.15) It is easy to forget this truth in the heart of conflict. The mirror on our soul often reveals far more than we are willing to accept.
Conflicts occur to the innocent as well as those less so. Just because they exists does not mean one has done something wrong. Taking a fresh hard look at one’s self opens one’s soup up to the possibility of reaching out to another that is equally convicted. Honorable intent has many friends.