Empower

Giving authority, and power is a gift.  When I receive this, I am excited and energized.  I have also come to realize I am often worried that I will mess things up!

My day began with a sharp and vivid door ringing in a dream.  As I jumped out of bed, I realized the house was naturally silent.  There were no sounds of traffic outside.  The mobiles and iPads were silent.  The hallways were still, with the only change coming from the lights automatically responding to my movement.

I initially thought of going back to bed.  In considering the option I found myself holding an invitation.  What if I gave myself permission to just be still?  I could listen, observe, and take note of whatever.  Success in this exercise was stillness and observation.  Notes were optional, something in a catalog I could examine later if I fancied. read more

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Confidence

The advantages of having experience often measured in decades is confidence.  As hard, difficult, and at times impossible something might be, experience gives one the confidence to know it can be done.  There is an interesting mix of awe, fear, uncertainty, and wonder which is mixed in with the confidence.  The more one is aware of “why” one’s experience was what it was, the more one is both humbled and resiliently confidence that the impossible could be within reach.

As I reflect on the various “why” answers in my experience, there are common threads which one finds in each memory.  They include the following. read more

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Elevated

My fitness band actively tracks my heart rate, its variability, and lots of nuances I do not fully understand.  I have grown to appreciate it brutal candor.  Strain is strain, no matter what the source.  Recovery is directly linked to sleep, hydration, and stress.  The dials and stats on my phone and notebook reflect my reality, no matter how much I want to spin a different story to myself.  As I note and reflect on the different ways my heart is elevated, I find myself more aware of my options, choices, and the journey I have chosen to take. read more

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Sunrise

As I begin each day, I have a fresh coffee embraced with the stillness found in a house not yet awake.  My vision looks out on man crafted green nature increasingly lit by a peaking sun coming through the silhouetted buildings on the horizon.  There is very little traffic to be seen.  Any activity serves as a reminder that we are never totally at rest.

My heart has a habit of revisiting several core decisions which frame out my life.  Central to these is my view on my supremacy versus a faith in the reality of a greater power. In the simplicity of the morning, the question is quite simple.  Experience and intuition remind me of the complexities and unanswered questions behind the question as well as my answer, however the choice seems refreshingly simple each morning.  Do I believe in a supreme being or am I and others like me at the top of the food chain? read more

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Next

There is a momentary force dominating many parts of life.  It is as all forward momentum is being challenged.  With the start-up, key person dependency has been highlighted by CVOID’s evil touch.  Along with the impact to those close to my heart, it is the difficulty of picking up conversations, reflective thinking, and deciding what comes next.  The blockade is not just on this front; tendons rebelling in both shoulders quietly rob me of a good night of rest and time in the gym.  Others one traditionally relies on are consumed by the need to deal with the day’s crisis-du-jour. read more

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Rhetoric

I am haunted by my actions in what I did as well as what I did not do during a recent business lunch.

It is a difficult story to tell, if only in the knowledge that I cannot undue the hurt I contributed to.  My confession is not offered with the idea that someone reading will offer me forgiveness.  Rather, my confession is a reminder to myself that within me lies good and bad, idealism and exploitation.  In this, I walk as tall as the man who is perfect and as low as the one who took advantage of others for his own benefit. In this paradox, “who” I choose to be is best described by my what, how, and why behind the “choice of action” in each moment. read more

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Desert

I wake up on most morning to a sunrise filled with green.  Two of Dubai’s lush spots are immediately within my vision.  While both are made by the hands of man and nurtured carefully by a small army of caretakers, it is easy to not look beyond and see the sands quietly dominate life in the Emirates.

I have come to appreciate sand.  Even in the middle of a rare sandstorm, it is good to realize how other forces creates the impression life is dominated by sand.  If not for humidity wrapping itself around each grain of sand and the evaporation which follows, I often wonder how many sandstorms we would experience. However, this is a question for another day. read more

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Blame

It is natural to find fault when things do not go one’s way.  As I fixed the adjustments on the rowing machine, my mind was confidently focused on setting a new personal best.  The data said my body was rested and ready.  Emotionally, I was feeling confident.

Twenty minutes later, I realized I was not going to come close to matching my top performances.  There was nothing in my tank.  Physically and emotionally, I rediscovered what it feels like to run on empty.  I had a numb wrist, my shoulders were aching, and my legs shared tremors. read more

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Cause

As I described Daily Whispers to a friend, I found myself travelling across time, picking up memories here and there.  Life has used so many faces to teach me the lessons I needed.  In good times as well as those darker, She continues to teach.

In the reflection, I see several who are beyond reach of a call.  I wish I was at peace with their departure.  For different reasons, I find myself in a dark space when I reflect on their absence.  As selfish as I know it is, the emotional void within me is tangibly real. read more

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Harmony

The evening was a fundraiser for someone that is easy to love.  He is a big yet gentleman with a soothing voice that always makes the listener feel better.  Rough times had been by his side for the last few months and this evening was a gathering for everyone to tangibly say “we care.”

I had no idea what to expect.  Looking back, whatever I expected was a pale dream to what unfolded.

I lasted for the first five hours.  A favorite venue opened on an off day and everyone who was part of the jazz and R&B music scene of Singapore dropped in.  The diversity of sounds that emerged took me to places I had long forgotten and a few I do not think I had ever considered.  With traditional jazz to Latin, old to new, R&B to a fusion blend that worked, the audience was treated to a unique musical journey that could never be planned much less repeated. read more

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