You never know when things will return. You may hope, you can fear, however life often reflects more of what we are than we are ever willing to admit.
When the girls were young I could anticipate the cycle of love and feedback, as they have grown into their own persons the process began to take on more complexities and variables. In many ways the biggest change over time is that my interaction actually changes the cycle; forgiveness and understanding when I fail comes back as mercy and compassion instead of unmitigated admiration and love. When you add the mergence of Carli and Whitney’s personalities, values, and choices you begin to a community at work.
As life unfolds I find myself experiencing the circle of my input. Compassion and calm crystallizes the anger around me, giving a clear pattern to distinct ways of expressing a view of community and relationships. In the same manner, as I remember and exact a price for perceived hurts and pains of yesterday, I find myself reliving Solomon’s observation.
“Those who return evil for good will meet their own evil returning.” (Proverbs 17.13)
I find myself examining the equation in new ways with the addition of a puppy in the house. Mollie responds to each person in fresh, unencumbered ways each time she discovers they are in the room. Nothing in the past haunts the relationship! A hard wag of the tail that soon consumes the whole body, finding itself coupled with a smile from ear to ear and eager anticipation. You can feel the excitement and eagerness! You know that you are loved exactly for who you are at that moment. The future becomes a choice.
When you and I reach out to God, acknowledging everything that She is, we always have a clean slate. As we live in community, for good or bad, the choice of how we respond is ours alone. For gifts of anger, I choose compassion and understanding. For spears of judgment, I choose mercy and grace. To the idols of self, I offer the Cross.
