In the Moment

There are certain moments, usually near the extremes, that are incredibly intense.  It is as if you have arrived.  Everything is flowing – peace, wonder, awe or frustration, fear, and anxiety.  You wonder if it could get any better or worse.  It is as if life has morphed onto the big screen and you have found yourself merely a spectator, caught up in the ride, experiencing the intensity life gives, and yet still not quite being a part of it all.
 
As I reflected on the subway home last night, relaxed after a hectic day, overwhelmed by the intensity of it all, I found myself floating along in the moment.  Life has given me more than I could handle.  I was safe, in the moment the safety felt like peace.  Much of yesterday came from the effort I had put into it.  There was far too much work at hand, overwhelming any chance of completely appreciating the wonderful spring day that graced New York.  Yet metaphorically, I was comfortable.  It was if I was the character in a story that went like this; “With half he makes a fire to warm himself and barbecue his supper.  He eats his fill and sits back satisfied with his stomach full and his feet warmed by the fire: ‘Ah, this is the life.’”  (Isaiah 44.16) 
 
I wondered as I walked the short distance to my apartment if I realized how false my state of being was.  Granted it felt good, even in my exhaustion.  Truly, I was accepting what was, even if it was small.  In the middle of chaos, I was resting on a peace island of my own creation.  With all due respect, it was a moment void of hope, assurance, and lasting peace.
 
We have the opportunity for more.  We can be in the moment with hope.  We can live in the present with compassion.  We can live with lasting peace.  The missing element then and the key element now is God.  This morning I turned to God and found God waiting for me.