As my mobile rang, I glanced at the name. A recent trigger reminded me that I had an unanswered question lingering.
“I know it is your dime, but I was just wondering. There is an individual that is working in your firm. He has an unusual last name though I cannot recall what it is.”
“I know exactly who you are thinking of. Yes, he does work with us. I brought him in a year ago to lend us a hand. He is doing an amazing job.”
Some connections never quite disappear. My memories have softened, almost to the point that I can look back and laugh. Almost, but probably not. Even as I write the words, I can feel the pain and anguish from a day where he slipped. It hurt. It still hurts, although the pain’s edge has long been lost. What surprises me is that the energy from our original connection still remains. I hope he continues to do well.
As I consider the dynamics, I am struck by the ability of the human spirit to always see the good in others, even when there is pain. Time often conspires with evil to harder our hearts and create a brittleness that we bring to our relationships. In each case there is a story of sadness that explain where we find ourselves. The one encounter that changes this for me is is forgiveness when I do not deserve it. In receiving, I understand how the role that acceptance plays in relationships, especially when there is a past.
One writer notes that “then God, our God, answered them (but you were never soft on their sins).” (Psalm 99.8) Separating the actions from the individual is crucial if we want to accept others as we long to be accepted. Without being overly dramatic, until we accept the forgiveness of others and forgive ourselves, we will never be able to forgive those around us.
Paradoxes emerge when hope, community and human weaknesses collide. With the connections between us, what happens next is a choice each must make.