The young boy’s tantrum in Mustafa was hard to ignore. He was loud, disruptive to everyone within a range twice his height, and angry. His mother was a sea of calm, at least for the moment. You could see the edges of her resolve wearing thin. I had no idea how long she was going to last. As it escalated, I ducked into a differ aisle and headed for safety.
As I think of the way power is used, peers with and to each other, positions of rank and authority among members of a committee or organization, I have come to realize that the best use their power with deftness and finesse, even though it does not always feel like it at the time.
Mantras that I find myself holding onto include the following.
Positions of power do not in themselves make what follows legitimate, useful, or helpful. When a writer talks about how one “takes one look at earth and triggers an earthquake, points a finger at the mountains, and volcanoes erupt,” (Psalm 104.32) there is no context to understand the interaction. The bully pulpit, the ability to stand on top of another, and potential trump one’s mother for a moment, does not in itself bring something meaningful.
Great leaders and admirable individuals I continue to learn from use power with discretion. I know they can dominate a room. On occasion I am see them do it! I also know that this is not their first choice. When used, among the alternatives available, the power displayed comes with a higher purpose.
When one cares deeply and compassionately, one is willing to use all the tools at hand to guide, direct, and move towards a better place. This means that power, sometimes devastating and ruthless power, will come into play. It also means that sensitivity, caring, and consummate compassion will dominate first.
Power plays continue in every interaction. By themselves they are neither good nor bad. At the heart of it, my intent and how it is received will determine if we move forward or back.
