The banter was light yet it seemed to have an edge. In the young company being discussed, its leaders spanned generations, cultures. They came with a wide range of experience. In an early conversation the subject of titles came up. One of the first questions up for debate was “traditional or fun”. By the end of the conversation fun won, well almost.
The exception was one insisting on a particular title, reflecting a desire and need to be in charge. I loved the need and the hunger. With a laugh and shared agreement, business cards orders were placed and pitch presentations updated with the agreed notations.
As I listened to the conversation, it seemed to be a mini-reflection on the events since. I found myself smiling inside – this could have been me years ago.
“There is a mini-coup building.”
“How can you say that?”
“I know they want my job!”
“Really? How do you know that?”
“You too? You want my job as well?”
“No, I am not even with your company. Why would I want your job?”
“Because they do! Everyone does.”
As funny as the conversation was, mainly in a childish kind of way, I wondered. Did I? Everything within me said no. I wondered why. The cycle of comfortable to jealousy is an old one. As one group fled the oppression of captivity, you would think happiness would follow. It did not; “one day in camp some grew jealous of Moses, also of Aaron, holy priest of God.” (Psalm 106.16) Was I part of the some?
“Guys, I have been there, done that. It is an exciting time for this company and I am doing exactly what I want I want to do for the community. For me, this does not involve any more than what we agreed. This is especially true with the role under debate. No thank-you.”
Even as I answered I knew my heart and mind were in sync. Finding one’s passions and discovering one’s calling opens a door to an intense peace within. Everyone has one of these points.
