As I listened to a story, I realized with certainty that I was being introduced to an individual who, until this moment, was unknown to me. I look back and defensively note I was paying attention. This included individual mannerisms, preferences, and perspectives. I had taken stock of the hints and glimpses into experiences and the background stories. For the most part, I was confident I had the initial measures.
On reflection, it is clear, I was clueless.
The story filled me with questions while opening doors to understanding the present. My perspective was so different that I did not recognize my earlier caricature. As I reflect on the process and my new understanding and insights, I am reminded of the following.
Everyone has a unique story, even Divinity. While I can categorize, generalized, and ultimately put an individual into one box or another, every individual has a story all her/his own. It is special. It is one of a kind. One of the priceless gifts we can give each other, is our story.
The only person permissioned and authorized to tell an individual’s story is the individual themselves. I once asked a friend and writer why I did not see more stories of his amazing children. His response reflected the heart of this wisdom mantra.
“Their stories are their own. While I have been privileged to play a character at times, each story is her/his to tell.”
Unless asked, many do not directly share. When asked, everything is on the table! Do you really want to know? If so, ask. My suggestion is to start with open-ended questions and see where they lead. Especially when one is permissioned, the process of asking and listening leads to a place one never imagined.
If in doubt about where to start, start with Divinity. There is a standing invitation to ask and listening with open silence. The psalmist shared threads, Divinity “makes the weather – clouds and thunder, lightning and rain, wind pouring out of the north.” (Psalm 135.7) There is more to this story waiting for us.
