Intensity, post being recognized for leading an initiative which became a defining example of intensity, means a lot more than traditional definitions of “an emotional quality” or “measurable amount of property”.
Intensity includes the steps along a journey, the passion, conviction, and perseverance one needs with each step, and ultimately completing the journey by successfully accomplishing what others thought impossible.
In the silent darkness of the night, I wrestle with the certainty that my attempts to be a better man will fail. It is not a new battle. Battle lines are moving, sometimes in ways which bring peace, on other occasions periods of overwhelming darkness. As the battle continues, I embrace a psalm with prayer grounded in faith. “Finish what you started in me, God. Your love is eternal – don’t quit on me now.” (Psalm 138.8)
To anyone who has wrestled in the dark night of the soul along with me and John of the Cross, I would offer the three reminders I hold close.
As long as we are asking, and beyond, God will never give up on us. The reason has nothing and yet everything to do with us. God loves us unreservedly and relentlessly. She gave birth to us all. While God is in a battle of her own, She offers unconditional love, an eternal home, and restoration.
It is our response to the battle for our life which defines us. I do not have to win the battle. God has already done the heavy lifting on this. I do have to engage and fight for myself. Fight to let go of placing myself at the center instead of community. Fight to let go of my doubts, choosing instead to live in faith. Fight to live in the moment, learning from the past while remaining in the present.
Give the priceless value God places on every human being, the battle will be intense, relentless, and endless. In the heat, I am reminded that I am a child of God empowered to bring care, kindness, and an inclusive embrace to everyone I meet.
