As I work through a series of contracts, I reflect on expectations, past and present. What do I expect? If it is a relationship, what are the expectations which apply to both parties?
In my pause,, I am transported to a time where I desperately wanted to hear Divinity’s voice. My expectations, hopes really, was that I could plug in with certainty. I would hear and potentially understand. My early attempts were not memorable. As I look at them now, I can only smile at my one-sided intent. With no recognizable success, I changed tactics.
I decided to show up each morning and simply wait in quietness. It was an inspired choice which I now highly recommend. While I do not think the time matters, everyone has a sweet spot in their day. In giving divinity my sweet spot, I found that when I showed up, Divinity did too.
Those early morning lessons remain with me.
Bodies and minds love routines. My fitness band reminds me my body loves going to bed at the same time each day. My experience in showing up for Divinity each morning grew as Divinity honored my commitment by being present with me.
I started my time with a Psalm prayer. While I know my welcoming comment would be fine, I found that in praying the psalms I would say blunt, honest, and candid things to Divinity that I otherwise would struggle to find the courage to say.
Divinity’s response was not what I expected. From impressions to whispers to moments of inspiration to utter and complete silence, Divinity has a voice all Her own. Her priorities are very different from mine. In letting go, I discovered a time of beauty, wonder, and focus. I discovered invitations to trust and act.
To the writer of this psalm, a belated thank-you. To the Divine, “If you wake me each morning with the sound of your loving voice, I’ll go to sleep each night trusting in you. Point out the road I must travel; I’m all ears, all eyes before you.” (Psalm 143.8).