The door was dark, heavy, and foreboding. I knew I had to go through the door to get to my destination and what was waiting. Knowing this did not make it easier. My fears, uncertainties, and doubts went into overdrive. Was this the right door? What if it was not? How much danger was I putting myself into?
As confident as I thought I was, in truth, my doubts were not easy to dismiss. As I reflect on the moment and now, I find myself returning to three whispers.
Fears are real and must be responded to, even if they have no factual foundation. My fear of the door and what lay behind it was a real emotion. My body was physically responding with an accelerated heart, sweaty palms, and heightened senses. At the same time, there were no known facts to support the fear. My decision on what to do next shaped by the uncertainty of what might be true combined with what might be possible.
What was behind the door could be deserved or gifted. Knowing the difference is helpful. When I know I have earned the result, opening the door to it is easier. I have earned the right to receive, even demand, the payment. Bluntly put, “If you’re a hard worker and do a good job, you deserve your pay; we don’t call your wages a gift.” (Romans 4.4).
Situations often play on my greatest fears combined with my sense that I am undeserving. The darkness and strength of this door were reminders of both. As I stood before it, the question then and now is the same. What will I do in this moment?
My answer then and now is the same.
In confidence, I will seek what I have earned. In humility, I will accept what I have been given. In the awareness that there are others like me, I will lend a hand where possible.
Life is shared among the family and community where I belong. In confidence, humility, and hope, today is an opportunity to walk with others.
