The pain was out in the open for my attention and action; I ignored it until hit squarely in the face yesterday. I am not sure how I reacted to the immediate; I do not my day stopped in many ways at that moment. What is going to be my sustained response? Is there something that I am doing to make matters worse? Can I do something? Will I take action? Do I care enough to change my own priorities? Do I have any sense of what is at stake for them, for me?
This is not the first time. Close friends, expressing their pleas for help in ways designed to reach everyone they think care enough to do something, slowly dying inside. The variety of symptoms showing the root problem is wide, from food disorders to depression to anger to forms of self-punishment. My failure to act is still haunting. The signs lay out in the open for all to see, examine, understand, and act on. The underlying problem was an item of discussion, however discussion took precedence over action. I have no explanation other than I just did not know because I was not looking.
Now that I see, what am I willing to do. I feel the pain, but do I trust? Am I willing to let go of the pain and leave it with God?
For others I make excuses, but do they apply to me? You and I walk with God. We experience the presence of the Spirit on the days we open the invitation. We know about unconditional acceptance, the gift of the Cross, and the opportunity of relationship. We know – “So nobody has a good excuse.” (Romans 1.20)
We know but do we experience? We see and feel others pain, are we willing to be God medics? Our symptoms are different, the problems have different names, but the solution is the same. We sense our failures, we know our weakness, and we carry a deep need for being part of a family, God’s family. Attention, action.
