“It seemed like a dream, too good to be true, when God returned Zion’s exiles. We laughed, we sang, we couldn’t believe our good fortune.” Psalm 126.1,2
Last night, it already seems like last week, a friend and I wandered the Madrid Airport for almost six hours. We arrived early for a flight only to discover that it was going to be two then three then four hours late. Tired, battered, and trying to clear a lousy sinus passage is not the best way to spend idle time. When we finally boarded the plane, a sense of peace flooded the heart and mind.
The past year, it already seems like a lifetime, came with ups, downs, and painful reflection. I arrived to a new job, country, and setting full of energy and excitement. I discovered a life that was more difficult than I ever imagined, more soul confronting than I thought possible, and far more painful than I anticipated. In many ways, I am a tired, battered, and trying to clear old cobweb out of my heart and soul.
A year ago, I had a dream. I knew God loved, cared, and desired to have relationships with people. I was just not sure that anything like this would ever be my experience. I also carried my history like a heavy backpack. I found myself wandering the desert, searching for a God unseen, dying of an unquenchable thirst.
Now I am on a journey. I still carry hopes and dreams for those close to my heart, but now I let them go in faith at least once each day. I know and see my failings (too many to count) overwhelming even when I feel strong. The difference is now I know God is present. There are several new pieces to the puzzle. I know with absolute certainty that God unconditionally accepts all of us, no exceptions! I know with as a core fact that God’s grace will continuously cover me, even when I intentionally do something stupid!
Now we can laugh, sing, and dance in God celebration!
