What do you really want?
I demanded that answer at times from everyone around me. I wanted to know exactly what my boss was looking for. I demanded to hear exactly what my wife was expecting. I contemptuously threw the questions into the faces of my parents and teachers as if my behavior was the direct outcome of their kindness, nurturing, and involvement in my life.
As aggressively as I have asked the question I have never gotten a straight answer. People usually don’t know they are not satisfied until they look at what they have. They are not sure they have a need until the present in held up in the light of the future with hope. However, most of the time I hurdled the words it was not in an effort to know and understand, it was an act of defiance and rebellion.
Human wisdom has a mandate in these kinds of situations. “After careful scrutiny, a wise leader makes a clean sweep of rebels and dolts.” (Proverbs 20.26) Look, listen, measure and then weed out the week and the strong. Keep only the middle ground.
In my life there were exceptions. I find that when love and mercy meet defiance something gives. When I met Garth Thompson in junior high I had met my match. Mercy beats rebellion everyday. When I encountered Ivan Higgins I had never met someone like that. Listening and love always wins out over judgment. When I ran into Walter Meske I learned how hope always burns away fear.
What do you really want?
That is the question each asks of the people around us, hoping that one of them will represent God and give us the answer. We want to know the facts. We need to understand what blocks our relationship with the Divine. We desperately want to be successful, if only for our self.
The answer comes even though we often do not understand.
Be my eyes. Be my ears. Reach out to those in need; comforting my children in pain, helping those in need.
