How does anyone know if their choice of a partner is correct? Several founders have asked me variations on this question recently. In each case, the initial founder has recognized that they need more capabilities and insights than they have within themselves. The conclusion is to find and sign another as a co-founder. It may sound easy, but to anyone who has been through the process, it is anything but easy.
My response is often shaped but the individual, what I know of them and the situation at hand. Having said that, I always start with the same theme. “I have no secret sauce or magical formula.” What I can offer is the lessons Life has taught me, the good and the bad, the easy and the something so difficult you are not sure you will ever get through it.
Before one can embrace, one must know “who” one is wrapping their arms around. This is more than just a superficial observation through bias filters. Ask, let the stories unfold in pace and cadence which works for the storyteller. Do not try to rush the process. Let the story unfold. Do something with the individual, the more variety the better! Let your heart and your head dialogue over the experience and how it is consistent (or not) with the stories.
Be prepared to be surprised. Individuals are always so much more than we think! History likes to remind us how insights only come with time and experience. If in doubt, think of the psalmist’s observation about divinity; “as it turns out, forgiveness is your habit, and that’s why you’re worshiped.” (Psalm 130.4). Who knew?
Be open to where the questions, stories, and experience lead. It may take a while, however, every heart and the value within reveal themselves through sharing steps and the journey. Something that initially appears wonderful may be anything but. Equally, what we initially reject maybe a great fit.
Life and its author have left an open invitation to see and experience from the inside out. You may be surprised as I am.
