As I consider the wake left by the boat pushing its way through, I reflected on the past now measured in decades. For those close to me for a long time, I wonder what they would say. What are the highs and lows of our journey? Which way would they describe the Psalm; “His lightnings light up the world; Earth, wide-eyed, trembles in fear.” (Psalm 97.4) A fear based on uncertainty and doubts, or a fear that is another word for awe and wonder, or something in between?
I consider the marks left on my heart and mind by life and the individuals that I have shared it with, I realize that each has influenced and changed me for the better. I have not always lived up to their dreams for me, but the push, pull, and tugs are the gifts of true friends. I do wish I could share the lessons of time with individuals who had to deal with the old me.
Taking steps forward is not always about speed. There are times where moving fast is the answer. Equally true, there are times where a slow response or quiet stillness is the best thing one can do to make progress. Be still to be slow to be fast.
The greater story is the starting point not the end. Listening and stepping into the stories of others enriches my story in ways I never understood or appreciated when I was young. It is good to listen, reflect, engage, and participate in the walk we share. In letting go of the need to get my story out first, I find that the community supporting my path is stronger and larger than anything I ever imagined.
Leading starts and ends with serving. It was never about me; it was and is always about us. Intuitively I knew that but there are too many moments where I look back and see that I lost sight of this truth. It is in nurturing the other that I learn and grow. It is in helping that I am helped.
