I sat in the restaurant, staring at the scar on the limb, knowing today was coming. Today is the shared birthday of two significant influencers in my life. They are both gone now. As much as I can echo the familiar themes of their words and shared experiences living on in my life, it is hard to get beyond the scars left in their absence. Today, life confronts me with an awareness of what is no longer possible. I feel the loss of laughter and conversation. I miss the opportunities to hang out and talk. I miss the individuals and their ability to bring more colour and details into my life.
I know the scar that reminds me of them has not fully healed. In contrast to other scars, I see the reminder, angst, and pain as reminders of the hope they infused in my life and visions for what can be.
Pain and loss are scars that are shared, even when one is not aware. A colleague lost his father last week. It was a harsh reminder of what happens to all we love. Natural and man-made disasters dominate our lives. It is hard to imagine anyone who is untouched. Life reminds me that no one’s loss is greater or less than my own. Everyone has or will be touched by unfathomable grief and a sense of overwhelming darkness at some point in her/his life.
Faith in Divinity’s promise of restoration and recreation can heal our heart and soul scars. The permanent healing will only come with the fulfilment of the promise. I know there are alternative remedies on offer. “If they had [worked], the worshipers would have gone merrily on their way, no longer dragged down by their sins.” (Hebrews 10.2). Instead, the angst and pain remain.
Scars are tattoos with better stories, or so my t-shirt says. Each scar, especially these two, is a gift of memories that bring courage, hope, and confidence. Because of them, I see more. I know their courage is now mine to use. Their hope is my hope.
