The sun steams in the window trying to stir the dust within. Despite intensity and relentlessness, nothing moves. In the stillness I am almost awake but not quite. Without warning, my mobile begins to ring even though I have no measurable signal. I have no idea who could be calling me at this hour of the day but I do know it is overwhelmingly annoying!
I look at the number knowing that I lack the energy or will to respond yet because my body is still asleep. While I am moving, it is as if I am in a dream. Nothing beyond the superficial works! The ring rolls to voicemail and I am left in the gentle stillness and silence. My body is on an autopilot routine of waking us, slowing checking to see if I am mentally and physically ready for the day.
As my checklist finishes, I realize I am refreshed and energized. The sleepiness that dominated my being when someone called minutes before is replaced by a willingness to take on life as it is. Every life has too much pain and anguish permeating its fiber. Each story has a plotline that should bring others to tears. In the chaos and uncertainty that surrounds us, I often find myself thinking that my life is harder, more difficult, and at times as painful as anyone around me. Reality is quite different! There is always someone with something more painful. In the quietness this morning I realize that in addition to great pain, great beauty also touches our lives.
I can see and touch beauty today. It brings gentle warmth, quiet reminders, and natural healing to my heart and soul. It is awesome yet also brings a fear because it calls me to embrace and give it away to those around me. The psalmist knew what I would experience; “A terrible beauty, O God, streams from your sanctuary. It’s Israel’s strong God! He gives power and might to his people! O you, his people – bless God!” (Psalm 68.35) I am refreshed, changed, and challenged.
