Every so often, I see myself clear and crisp. Without being too punishing, the cold reality is that all of us have our personal demons. In that glimpse where one sees one’s self for exactly what is–demons, broken promises, and weaknesses-one discovers that there is a choice. You either give up and know that “in one day, disasters will crush her—death, heartbreak, and famine—then she’ll be burned by fire, because God, the Strong God who judges her, has had enough,” (Revelation 18.8) or you accept was is mysteriously freely offered – unconditional mercy and acceptance.
I find myself wanting to postpone this decision for reasons that I do not understand. Perhaps it is that life gets comfortable and I discover a hope of my own creation. Yet in that moment I find myself reading the headlines of any daily, consumed by the carnage that humans inflict on each other. In another moment I discover how vulnerable the human body is to disease. With a know cause the acceptance takes on a natural force yet increasingly everyone involved seems to be an innocent. Just when I think it is safe I play a round a golf under the caution of leaving my wallet in the car, just in case!
Cold sweats touch us all, even though we go to great lengths to hide and deny. For some it is the dream that never quite ends, for others it is the nightmare they face with the dawn of each day. Regardless of how hopeless it is there is something mysterious from which I often find myself running away. God offers us an unconditional pass to peace, happiness, and hope if we accept the premise that He is love. The counter argument is that he is unfair and “we” know better. One glimpse into my life’s mirror and I know that answer to the counter argument!
So the question rests in the cold morning fog of San Francisco. What will I do with my demons? What will you do with yours? God is here, patient always.