In the view out the back window of the home that was my father’s, I see a row of trees masking his workshop. The simple structure served as a sanctuary for several decades. It was here in this space that many got to see him in full flow. Laughter, hard work, and great results were common. The teacher within was always close by. If you wanted to get inside the man, this was one of the special places to realise your goal.
As I think of those who know me, I think there are very few who know the full story. There is no question that there are obvious pieces of my life on display. Some conclude that this is all there is. I know there is more. In every situation where I have let someone become an insider in my life, there was a combination of giving permission and sharing an invitation. With these two and another’s acceptance, the three elements were in place.
Letting someone inside is an act of trust. Frankly, it is risky. Acceptance is on the line. One is vulnerable as weaknesses and failures are exposed. In my experience, it has never been pleasant to be rejected or ghosted. When the trust is not honoured, I find myself struggling to maintain the trust that remains.
Fear can appear to dominate beauty and wonder. Not knowing can feel like a headwind as one takes a step forward. The best counterweight I have is remembering being loved and embraced. As I remember the strength that comes from being part of a community, I am filled with courage in the awareness that I have insiders looking out for my best interests. Old words come alive; “He [Divinity] knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God.” (Romans 8.27)
As I think of the past, of permission given and invitations shared, I experience a wonderful sense of peace of being an insider. I hear a calling to let others, especially Divinity, into my heart and soul.
