I find myself listening to a song, pausing in the colors and sense of a moment in time, caught in the artist cries buried in his or her painting and realize that someone has pulled a longing thread within my soul. It is difficult to deal with the moment; tears well in my eyes, every sense of time seems to go into suspense, and I find myself confronted with something from deep within my core.
I may have understood that I had this longing. Yet, I do not think I really knew it as I do in this moment. I may have felt the longing before, yet the intensity and overwhelming flood of whatever it is that fills my soul confronts me in a way that prevents me from turning away. I must deal with this longing. I must understand what is happening to me. I must fill the emptiness within me.
I continue to struggle in articulating how intensely the tugs on my longings are in my life. In the past few weeks, I have rediscovered several points of critical importance in my life. Nothing else takes precedence. In the confrontation that can come in looking through a lens into another’s soul, I found myself seeing and experiencing the void in my own life. In the first moment I experienced a painting from a great artist, I found myself struggling with the tears of a father’s joy and fears.
When I read God’s expression captured by another writer, “I want them back, every last one who bears my name, every man, woman, and child whom I created for my glory, yes, personally formed and made each one.” (Isaiah 43.7) I find myself caught in God’s love. God’s void is my void. God’s hope is my hope. God’s way is my way.
I look forward to the day that my longings find their resolution. The opportunity exists, with God – here, now. I know you share some of my longings. You also struggle with your own. Our answer lies with a God of beauty, love, and compassion.
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