I never saw him. I did not know he was there, because it never occurred to me to look. While I am not sure how I would have reacted if I had known, I never had the chance. I believe I was seen. I assume that my actions have been understood within a context I did not create or intend. Whatever it might have been, it is now an obstacle. The perceptions are out of my control, yet they are real. The analysis does not include all the facts, however it seems complete. The conclusions are logical while being inherently flawed.
Even as I write of an event of the yesterday evening, I wonder if I am describing myself. How willing am I to move beyond my perceptions? Am I willing to accept the possible? If there are roadblocks, will I take all necessary steps open up the possibilities no matter how painful they might be?
As I look at the obstacles within my sight, I reflect on how others before me have dealt with their challenges. When “Paul wanted to recruit him [Timothy] for their mission, but first [he] took him aside and circumcised him so he wouldn't offend the Jews who lived in those parts. They all knew that his father was Greek.” (Acts 16.3) Would I go to that extreme, especially if I knew it was simply a way of dealing with how others saw things?
Am I committed to reaching beyond the limitations others as well as I have set? Will I step beyond my fears? Can I reach through my comfort zone into the unknown? Am I willing to go through pain for the cause?
I think of last night and I begin to recite all the reasons for not doing anything. Life is never as simple as the words that are used to describe it are. Conflicting values and priorities are inherently part of every decision. How we respond is much closer to sailing than traditional analytics.
I may not solve yesterday. I can respond to the moment at hand.
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